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three ways in which married couples maintain the strength of their relationship

 There are three ways in which married couples maintain the strength of their relationship despite external influences



How to maintain a monogamous relationship, regardless of external stimuli?

 In our daily life, we are exposed to being more attractive than our partners. Even those in satisfying relationships may be attracted to others. 

Romantic films depict true love withstand these variables. Experiences in the early stages of a relationship also reinforce this view, as partners are attracted to each other and not interested in others.


This stage of intense interest reaches its climax early, in the first six months of the relationship, and begins to decline after the first year, and this is not a bad thing, as the love moves to a more stable and comfortable phase.


But it is at this stage that other people begin to appear in our lives, and we feel attracted to those who are attracted to them. Neurophysiology research shows that simply making eye contact with an attractive person stimulates reward-related areas in the brain, prompting us to approach them.


The greater the attractiveness of the new person, the less satisfied the person was with his current relationship and his commitment to it, even in relationships that were characterized by a high degree of contentment and commitment, which may lead to betrayal, which is a major cause of broken relationships.

What can you do? We often have - or choose - to spend more time with other people - like our colleagues at work - than we spend with our partners.

Being attracted to others can complicate our lives. Research shows that the majority of people (84%) agree with their partners about maintaining a monogamous relationship, even though more than half (55%) did not discuss the matter explicitly. Having another attractive person in our life can be a strong indicator of a lack of commitment in the relationship, and this may overwhelm personality and relationship quality.


So how do couples maintain their monogamous relationships despite the presence of other attractive people?

A promising area of research reveals the strategies used by long-term partners in maintaining monogamy that is a combination of cognitive and behavioral responses when interacting with attractive people. They include:

1- Does not show signs of attraction, such as imitation of actions or eye contact

Simply do not communicate with them - even if it is non-verbal - such as flirting with them or telling them about your feelings if you want to preserve the current one-off relationship. You may have felt the urge to connect with them physically or emotionally, but keep it in your mind (see No. 3). Flirting is fun, but it can be the start of a perilous journey.

2- Using self-regulatory resources - such as ignoring the thoughts that encourage response to the other side - to hide interest

In a classic scene from "The Simpsons," Homer takes an elevator with fellow hot Mendy, telling himself, "Think of unexciting things!" To think of unpleasant images and ideas.


Betrayal is a very slippery slope. You must be aware of your weaknesses and plan the next steps. For example, if you know you tend to flirt when you drink, do not celebrate drinking when you are in the company of a female colleague who feels attracted to her. If you know that you tend to flirt when you are away from your partner, for example on a business trip, you can avoid this by staying in touch with your partner. 

Staying in touch with an ex-partner, even if this connection is virtual and through social media only, maybe a trait that indicates some kind of sophistication, but it may be an entry point for more curiosity and interest. To maintain your relationship, you have to set rules, such as the "no-touch" rule or "Don't drink with an attractive person."

3- Rate the attractive person less positive, even negative evaluation

Or what psychology calls the "diminishing effect." It is an effective and learned strategy. Instead of focusing on a person's positives such as a sense of humor, intelligence, or beauty and elegance, focus on negatives such as their strange way of laughing, their criticism of others, or their asymmetric eyebrows. Bringing up an image of an attractive person while you are alone at night may be harmless, but it may be harmful if those perceptions affect your daily life. Try to override those thoughts and focus your thinking on your partner's advantages and positives.


Infidelity is not something that happens automatically, although many of us may claim it does. It's easy to get off track. Be true to yourself, are you ready to sacrifice your current relationship? If not, then you should know that meeting attractive people is normal and expected, but you need to know your weaknesses, especially if you have to spend time with an attractive person. Use the methods above to stay straight.

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